I've been meeting resistance and my relationship to it, in all sorts of relationships and situations: with friends, colleagues, family, partner, myself and even with strangers. I've soared on a few occasions, tread water during others and also experienced some crashing and burning. It's been kind of like trying to go further in a more challenging yoga pose on the mat. Sometimes the effort is rewarded and the experience is exhilarating. Sometimes the effort is just totally awkward or painful and the pose just doesn't feel right. Usually resistance to working with how my body wants to move that day is what finds me crashed out or just not feeling it. Its when I work with that resistance using a few key tricks that I can get closer to or experience the exhilaration of embodying and enjoying the bliss of a challenging pose. Lately it feels like I'm alot better at meeting resistance on the mat than in the more challenging areas of my life. But on the mat is a great place to start cultivating the skills that will help me to navigate resistance in my life.
The skills are simple: show up, stay grounded, breathe. I can't help but notice that when I apply these skills in my life - even when I don't want to - inevitably resistance starts to give in, movement is possible and the moments unfold with a little more ease. In life, this can be challenging and the exhilaration experienced on the mat can feel a little bit more elusive. Especially if I am doing the work - showing up, grounding and breathing - and nothing seems to be happening. If the person I'm trying to resolve an issue with doesn't respond. If the car doesn't start. If I can't advance in a pose. If my day isn't going as planned. If the weather keeps changing. As it turns out, I am learning that it seems that none of that matters. What seems to matter is how I'm relating to my own resistance and my ability to show up, be grounded and breathe, no matter what is happening. However that person wants to behave. However the car is acting today. However the pose looks today. However the day is unfolding. However the weather wants to change. It doesn't matter. What an exhilarating thought!
If we can call upon these key skills, then resistance has these juicy lessons to teach us:
Show Up. Ground. Breathe. And... Surrender.
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Also known as 'corpse' pose, Savasana, is prime time to integrate new ideas, skills and healing energy without doing any work at all. Similar times in life are the pauses we take before responding or reacting to a situation, a few conscious moments we might spend taking in a glorious sunset, a sweet nap or a good night's sleep. Being still, after working hard, is one of the best ways to strengthen our personal resilience in many areas of our life. Any big effort that is followed by stillness and reflection increases our ability to embody the lessons that life brings, so that in future moments, our ability to meet resistance grows.
